Will it be this life or that one?
Probing, yes (that's what he said). But what's the answer? For me, the time has come to put aside [pretty much] everything to focus solely on my family. For the last many years, I've been pushing them off when my primary full time job is supposed to be full-time SAHM. It started off that way when offspring #1 was small, but of course life is effing expensive, so, without leaving home, I found ways to make some cash. No, I did not sell my crazy hot bod (yeah right) from my living room couch. Nor did I invent the wheel but man I wish I had. However, I did use, to the best of my ability, my so-called writing skills to help make ends meet.
But not without painful sacrifice.
I used to love writing but for months now I've been battling with a multitude of issues that have led to this nagging feeling deep in my gut telling me to choose. My kids or my work. I tried to ignore it, but I realized it's time to give my children the attention they deserve while they're still young. I guess all I needed was a good fork to make me choose. We may not be rich in money, but I hope we make up for it in love, or whatever that saying is. I should be a philosopher. Maybe I'll look into that.
Anyway, my only New Year's resolution in the coming year is to be the best mother, wife, daughter, sister, and person I can be. Everything else will just have to wait. I'll write that killer book (in my own name) someday. I'll devise a plan to rid the world of plastic cups someday. I'll swim with the dolphins someday. I'll have a pony named Tickle Tickle someday. I'll touch Ryan Gosling's abs someday.
With all the tragedy in the world, I just want to hug my loved ones tight for as long as I can. What else matters, really? I'm hugging you all now. For a really long time. And no, I won't let go.
Thanks for always reading, always supporting, and always hugging me right back.
What are your resolutions for the coming year? I hope it involves hugs and/or ponies.