Okay, a few something stupids. Friday night was the first time in awhile I was ready, willing and able to (as my best dude would say) tie one on. Apparently when I go, I go big or go the hell home. Mix an insane amount of alcohol (for me) with what appears to have been food poisoning and you have an entire Saturday of up-chucking.
I couldn't keep water down. Dehydrated and weak, we called the nurse line (per the back of our insurance card) who gave me this helpful information.
"Drink water. Keep it down. Feel better."
Yeaaaahhhhthanks. Saturday night at 7:15pm was the last bit of nothing pumped from my intestines, and so far, I'm better. Through all of this, something that only happens to Candyland, happened. Remember when I told you about my toilet glasses, yeah well...
Friday, I dropped my phone in the effing toilet.
I have no words for what a filth-mongering toilet-magnet I've become. Oh the good old days are long gone; the days I never dropped things in toilets...
But, it wasn't all bad. The highlights of the weekend, though, far outweigh the pain and humiliation of throwing up in the driveway.<---gross
-Best dude and hubs joined forces to fix my toilet phone. It works, but after answering a call, I now know what it means to be considered a
-Even through the trashcan and toilet hovering, my beautiful offspring rubbed my hair and told me repeatedly to "feel better" and "throw up in the trashcan, not in the bed."
-I lost about twenty pounds by the looks of what came up.
-I literally was aloud to lay around and do nothing. What an odd experience. I don't recommend it.
-Though I don't know the exact food culprit that spawned this, I've vowed to eat better (kind of) (let's not push it) (who are we kidding, i'll have a reece cup by noon)
-I had an excuse not to exercise (like I need one of those)
-I know for sure my best dude is exactly that for a reason. Though we test each other often, when it comes down to grit (helping drunkie walk, hugging her mid-vomit before he leaves), he takes care of me.
-I know for absolute sure the hubs truly loves me after 1) childbirth 2) my brief fascination with the Jonas Brothers 3) watching me vomit all day and never flinching while taking charge of our baby and the house.
So, friends, Candyland is still recovering but happy to report I may have some answers this week. Yeah answers!
Until then, tell me about the time you were too sick to stand...(or blog. Yikes!)
Candyland Out<--literally my system is completely empty. I swearz.