First things first. Has anyone seen my glasses *checks toilet*?
Okay second, #thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou to every one who read, commented and/or donated to the cause. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, read yesterday's post. It doesn't get more real, or hit closer to home than this.
And third, this just in: the mother supports Team Candyland. Just look at that enthusiasm. She obviously can't wait to spread the word about J2W in such a stylish way. Her excitement is effing inspiring....
Candyland decided to partake in a delightful, handmade s'more. The child was in bed, it seemed like an innocent enough treat. So I gobbled the thing down my suckhole...wait... I meant to say, I gobbled the thing down my
Fast forward to a trip to the bathroom. (do you see where this is going...). I caught a quick glance of myself in the mirror and found not a small trace of graham, but many thick streaks of melted chocolate plastered on my cheek, forehead, and even a little on my eyelid (its a wonder he takes me out to eat in public at all). Thanks, dear...
Random Fact: Yesterday morning, after waking in a sleepy stooper, I turned the computer on but nothing happened. Dead battery and, the charger was missing. In the place I usually leave it was, instead, a small, black cord I'd never seen before. I tore through the house, ransacking clean, neatly folded laundry, pulling out drawers, and everything in between with tears filling my eyes. At about a minute past sanity, I pulled the mysterious cord from the cabinet and stuck it in the computer, out of curiosity.
To my surprise, it fit. I was stunned. And the computer was actually charging. "WTF?" I thought. It was only about a half an hour before I realized...wait for it...wait....IT WAS THE SAME EFFING CORD I WAS LOOKING FOR. If you see my mind anywhere, let me know.
After yesterday this feel up was more than I could have imagined. Thanks for being so gentle. That's why I love you and your keyboard pounding hands, friends. Until Monday (when I hope my head's on straight), tell me, would your significant other let you write SUCKHOLE on their face?
Candyland (I think). OUT.