Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Kill a cup, save a nut(job)

Thanks to TIM<--aka Matty<---, today's post is ridiculous. Per yesterday's request, I asked for it, and you gave it to me. Good. I should've known you little sneaks wouldn't take it easy on me. So now, I give you a sonnet...about a mother trucking plastic cup.

My hatred for a cup has never been more, (seriously)
Greater than gators and coconuts and heat,
Its bright-colored plastic was quite the eyesore,
But my husband exclaimed "This is neat!"

The ugly cup was everywhere,
It tormented my every night's sleep,
My dear husband didn't have a care,
That his cup was some kind of creep.(a perv in the cuppiest way)

It happened one rainy day, (I don't remember)
I wouldn't just let the thing be,
I couldn't help but to throw it away,
Then I pretended that it wasn't me.(cats are good for blaming)

The cup will remain in our hearts and our minds,
Because that SOB nearly ruined our lives.

Yeah, it sucks, but what else would you expect in Candyland? Exactly. So now, go ahead and re-read (or read) THIS POST and leave a comment for your chance to win a book of choice via the Book Depository. But first tell me, what object have you ever had such an intense hatred or disliking for in your life? I can't be the only nutjob here.

Candyland. OUT.


Jessica Bell said...

LOL. Cute! No you're not the only but job :o) I've got a list of many things! But won't go into it here ... ;o)

Matthew MacNish said...

Jess said butt job. Well, almost.

And that was awesome. I knew you'd pick me first.

The thing I love about this cup is that allows me to connect with you AND Erik. Which rules.

I hate phones.

Jessica Bell said...

Oh shit!!! LOLOL. I meant nut job! hahaha

Linda G. said...

*applause* Love your poem! It has passion. :)

And, no, I can't think of anything I hated that much. I did have a mild dislike for a hideous afghan my husband loved, so I gave it to my daughter's cats last time they visited. (Cats ARE handy, aren't they?)

salarsenッ said...

My hubby used to wear the ugliest plaid shirt. Yeah...plaid. He so did it to piss me off.

Patty Blount said...

Um, don't hate me for this but Play-Doh. I can't STAND the stuff. I hate the way it smells, the way it feels, the way it dries into brightly colored chunks of concrete that I step on because I can't get it out of my carpet.

Play-Doh is evil, I tell you!

Anne N Kenny said...

I'd have to say 80% of baby/children toys. Why are they so loud? Why can't you turn all of them off? Why the eff do they become possessed at 3am? Ya know?

Nicole Zoltack said...

Anne is so right! I swear baby toys are possessed! Last night, I was up really late going research of my newest shiny idea, and one of the baby toys starts to play of no reason whatsoever! Scared me to death!

And I enjoyed the poem. :)

Heather said...

ROTFL! I know I can always count on you to make me smile. Thank you for that!

Riv Re said...

Nice. Sorry, but I can't think of anything I really hate. I recently went through an irritation phase with a one year warranty: my watch died. The day after the one year warranty expired.
Nothing major, at least. I just got the battery replaced (a whole six dollars!) but the sound isn't working...

Oh! I have something I hate! (SomeONE actually) That stupid WSJ reporter, Meghan, who thinks YA Lit is evil.

Anywho, nice sonnet. :)

Janet Johnson said...

You are too funny! I have passionately hated my couch cover. Grateful for it, because you should see the couch, but I just can't wait to get rid of it.

If ONLY I could blame it on the cat. :)

Beverly Diehl said...

Plastic grocery bags. (It's a love-hate thing.) I love them because I don't use them that often - I have canvas bags - but they are handy for cat poo. (You knew cats were at the root of this.)

And yet, though I don't get them at the grocery store, though I use one up every day... still, there are more and more and MORE of them in the cupboard each time I look. What are they, mating in there?! Therefore, I hate plastic trash bags because they apparently have a more active sex life than I do. *sob*

Johanna Garth said...

LOL! Do I hate anything that much...not unless you count the crazy sweatshirts with random bows sewed on them my aunt gives me for every gift giving ocassion.