Punch a sign in the face today and get free tickets to nothingland

You hear it all the time. "It was a sign, I know it. It's fate. It's totally meant to be. It's this, it's that." Whether it's about the agent you keep running across on various sites (it's not a sign, it's called stalking),  the fact that the clock is stuck at 9:59 every time you look at it (okay, maybe that's just me), or how so-called contests pop up with (what seems to be) the opportunity you've been waiting for. It doesn't matter. Signs can officially suck it.

Let me tell you a little story about Candyland. It goes a little something like this:

Candyland was a fair (olive) maiden who loved to cook plunge toilets write. One day she decided to write a book because it's sooo easy to write a book, like anyone can do it (all saracsm). After many months of toiling, the book of sucketh made it's debut into the world like a naked, whiny baby in need of milk from the teet (the revision teet, that is). Candyland loved that baby so much, she spent days, nights, hours that didn't exist transforming that whiny baby into something called Suck #2.

When Suck #2 was a few months old, Candyland queried agents near and far, short and tall, awesome and awesomer. Until Candyland had a revelation: "Why don't I write the book in reverse?" Lightbulbs went off and exploded over her head. Until the rewrite sucked too.

Fast forward through betas, rewrites, various distractions and a complete depression where the book sat untouched and unloved for months. Then Candyland had another revelation that she can't share until her book sees the light of day: *giggles* More query letters were sent and Candyland started getting ridiculous requests to read her baby. She was so excited, the feeling in her gut knew she'd found an agent somewhere in there.

Annnnnnnnd here we are.

Every last agent has responded. All with fantastic news. Apparently, I can kind of write. I may have a compelling high-concept book, I have a strong voice and one went so far as to say she'd sign me right now.....if she was looking for fiction.

I've spent so much time and energy looking for a reason to stay positive, looking for a sign to tell me what to do. When the point is, my story is the sign. I wrote it. I obviously believe in it or I wouldn't still be slaving to find it a home. I'm a writer. It's what I do. My advice to you Candylanders? Lose the signs, and believe in yourself enough to make your own effing sign. Power to the peeps.

Have you felt a fate-like moment lately? Tellmetellmetellme

Candyland. OUT.