Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Feeding the wolves...a step backwards

Like a lot of bloggers, I've sort of taken an unofficial hiatus (in case you haven't noticed). While everyone has their reasons, mine, as of late, aren't all pregnancy related. Sure, I could tell you I've been busy treating hemorrhoids and licking frosting off the refrigerator door (both untrue), but that's not it. In fact, it has more to do with this writing/publishing/social media thing. I don't know if I'm the only one. Maybe it's the hormones making me whack. Maybe my journey has taken too many turns and I'm not ready at this point in my life. Maybe I'm not meant to be one of the thousands of published authors blowing up Facebook and Twitter with a constant update of the status of their book.

Just not now.

With this baby we've worked so hard for so long to make, life takes a different perspective. Instead of spending hours at the computer spewing out stories, I'm spending time with my family. Instead of daydreaming about what my book will look like on the shelf, I'm creating a realistic goal, with my husband, for ours and our children's futures. There is no balance in writing and I guess, right now, the biggest ball I refuse to drop is that of my family, while I sit around and think of different titles for my next best seller.

This isn't the end of me, or my stories or my stupid posts. I'm just re-evaluating what my time is worth at this point in my life. And, if something miraculous were to happen, after all the pitch contests won, after all the full and partial requests, after the agent who crushed me to the point of surrender, I'd jump back in without skipping a beat. But for now, this is my reality. I will not disappear, and I will still post and be around for all of you, friends. I just need to breathe while I decide my fate, instead of waiting on others to tell me if I will make it or not. That's what I'm telling myself, anyway. Maybe if BR80 says it, I will actually believe it *scribbles note to harass famous bassist for a quote*

I'm rooting you on, friends. Maybe you have the drive I'm lacking right now. Maybe you have the next brilliant novel on your hard drive. Maybe you will be on the shelf, very, very soon. I hope that's true. I also hope Katie Holmes calls me soon so my offspring and Suri Cruz can have a play date.

See, I'm still me. But for now, I've stopped feeding the wolves:

(If you can't view, look up the lyrics to 10 Years "Shoot It Out"...)

Candyland. OUT.

32 comments:

K. M. Walton said...

Candace, every writer needs a break from it all (especially the ride you've been on, girl). You are smart to STOP, reassess and then move forward.

Stay strong.

Abby Minard said...

I'm right there with you Candace. When it comes to family, nothing is more important and I feel like I'm on the same road as you. Hang in there- it may not happen today, but it'll happen. We have our whole lives ahead of us- lets enjoy this time with our babies now instead of regretting it 20 years down the line. Good luck, and it never hurts to keep writing because you love it!

Magan said...

I've felt the same way and I'm so glad that you blogged about it to know that I'm not alone!

Nicole Zoltack said...

Family is so so SO important so no one blames you for taking a step back. Go ahead. :)

Shannon said...

Candy,

You are not alone. I believe you have your priorities straight - your husband and your children should come first. Everything else is icing. ;)

Take the pressure off yourself. Blog when you feel like it. Or don't. You're not going to lose any friends over your decision to put your family first. And if you do. F 'em. <3

Anonymous said...

We all need a break from writing/social media from time to time, and yes, family is always most important. Just please post occasionally! I'll miss your sarcastic humor too much! Good luck to you, girl!
Kelly P

Jamie Grey said...

I've been feeling the exact same way - I'm glad to know I'm not the only one getting burned out on some of this. It's always good to take a step back, regroup, and refresh. And that way when we decide we're ready to come back, we're excited about it.

Have a wonderful time with your family and enjoy yourself - life is too darn short! Good luck with everything :)

Renae said...

Good for you for knowing when to slow down. You are not alone in the bummed out department...take the time you need it does help!

Enjoy your time with your family.

Sarah Pearson said...

Good for you for being smart enough to know when it's time to take time out. Nothing comes before family.

Matthew MacNish said...

That video is scary as hell.

And family isn't just a ball, it's like a whole planet, a whole world full of love and unicorns and awesome little cuddly things. It makes anything worth it.

I know, because I made one, fought tooth and nail for it, pissed and cried and moaned and scratched my way out of the gutter in order to make it work (sort of) and even though my kids are way too cool for me, and rarely listen to my idiocy (good for them). It makes everything worth it.

You could shoot me in the face with a super-soaker full of giardia induced diarrhea and I'd laugh at you, because I have my family. But ... um ... please don't actually do that.

Amanda J. said...

Life happens. I think we'll all still be here to see what you're up to and support you with whatever comes up. We may have all connected because we're readers and writers, but we aren't going to go away just because you're focusing on your family.

You do what's best for you, and I'll still be here waiting to hear what shenanigans you've gotten yourself into. I hope you're having a wonderful summer so far! <3

Solvang Sherrie said...

I'm right there with you. I only have a few more summers with my kids at home actually wanting to spend time with me. I'm enjoying it, and them!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Real life comes first! With another book coming out next spring, I'm still going full force, and I understand how much effort it requires.

Heather said...

You're in what I now call the sweet spot. It's that point when you realize agents and editors don't hold the key to your success, you do. Once you grab hold of that, there's nothing to stop you. :)

Lindsay said...

Enjoy your family time. Taking a break is sometimes needed to get back your writing focus. But real life comes first ;D

Elena said...

I feel the same way, without being pregnant, although after my fifth and possibly final draft I do feel like I've given birth to a baby I can't look at right now.

Jamie Burch said...

The writing and blogging is something you can come back to whenever. But, yeah, you don't want to miss out on the precious time with your family.

I took a break last summer and came back to it feeling recharged and my writing improved.

Enjoy your time and getting ready for the new baby! We'll be here when you feel like visiting...:)

Jo Schaffer said...

There must be something in the air.
The rat race nature of social media can really blow.
Take a break if you need. But remember that some of us bloggers are happy to hear from you as a friend-- whether you promote your writing or not. (=
Peace.

Lenny Lee* said...

hi miss candace!
follow your heart!
i love you!
...big hugs from lenny

Madeline Bartos said...

Isn't it awesome to know that there are a bunch of writer friends here to support your decision? Have fun spending time with your family. :)

Leslie Rose said...

Bravo for perspective. Wishing you a happy, healthy, sleep through the night early baby.

Elana Johnson said...

It is a constant battle to figure out where your time should be spent. I don't think you can ever go wrong by spending it with those you love.

*hugs*

Linda G. said...

Sounds to me like you have your priorities exactly right. :)

You know, I've always thought it's possible to do it all...just not necessarily at the same time.

Sharon K. Mayhew said...

It sounds like you have your priorities in order, my friend. Your babies and hubby should come first. I'm sure hormones are playing into this a bit. I expect at some point in the future you'll get the urge to write again. Even when that happens your number one focus should be your family. I'm gald you aren't going to stop blogging. I'd miss you terribly.

February Grace said...

There is no more important work in the world than the work you are doing right now.

Bravo for keeping straight what so many people- and not just writers either- lose sight of for work or art.

The kids will go, and someday, the house will echo so empty- you will have more time to write than you know what to do with.

Trust me.

Good for you, Candace. You've worked so hard for this family. Enjoy every single minute.

~bru

Alison Miller said...

It does sound like you have your priorities in order! Good for you. When you have nine lives, it's hard to juggle, and sometimes we do just need a break to re-evaluate and refresh.

I'm rooting for you - in your mommyhood and in whereever life takes you.

Anne N Kenny said...

Summertime=family time. I think that's why everything slows to a crawl. Like today, I planned to write/rewrite all day and instead I have been taking over both of my kids Pokemon games whenever they get stuck. I keep doing the same thing over and over, just ten minutes apart!

Natalie Aguirre said...

Family is most important. And breaks are sometime good. I know you'll find the right balance for you.

Matthew MacNish said...

How was that cake? I've been thinking about it ever since. You seriously have the nicest friends. I wish I could afford to send you something other than just dumb jokes. I hope they make you smile.

Kelly Breakey said...

Just keep entertaining us via facebook and I am good. It's nice to know where to get my candy fix on at.

Brianna said...

That little bun of yours is and should be your number one priority!

I'm in a weird place now as far as social media and blogging goes. I'm trying to set some goals and reevaluate why I blog and what I want to get out of it. It's harder than I realized to write about what I know and enjoy while trying to please an audience.

Establishing a voice through writing is tough, but you've completely accomplished it! It doesn't matter what you write about, I enjoy it because of your style and sass! It doesn't matter if you post every day or once a month, you've completely won me over. I'd ask you how you managed to do it, but it's probably some supernatural special ability!

K.D.Storm said...

You have to do what is right for you in this area of life. I will be here rooting you on regardless what you decide to do and know that everyone needs a break every once in a while. Good luck.