In re: to yesterday's verbal vomit post (I love you, dear), the hubs thought he ought to make things right (how very Matt Br80 of him...). So, being the sweet piece of Candy[land] I am, I said "sure, honey, why the hell not?" I mean, it can't get much worse than "your face is God awful," so here we go (my notes in red):
Why do you spew words?
I like to talk. No joke. And for the most part, I like to sound smart, so out it comes. En mass sometimes. I also like to be descriptive, which is where my misuse of words comes in. I'm searching for a synonym or an adjective and my brain just gets to wandering and its all over.
What goes through your head while these weirdo bullets shoot me in the eye?
I'm searching for something good. Sometimes I love you just doesn't cut it. So I'll start out with something like "baby, I love you so much...." and then my brain is already on its next topic, but I haven't finished that sentence yet. So then my brain continues...insert his foot issue here.
What is one verbal vomit you'd like to clear up right now?
Wow. Just one? !!! It's hard to pick just one. But I guess we'll start with when I said you weren't as big anymore. You've never been into exercise blogging is totally excersie so when you started I tried to give you as much encouragement as possible. But instead of just saying "you look great baby" or something else, I went with "you're not as big anymore" while holding onto your waist.
How did you score such a sweet, honest, caring etc etc etc wife?
Well for one, I'm lucky. For two, you love me. All of me. Including my stupid nonsense remarks that come from my mouth. I love you. Too true.
If you could hang out with anyone what crap would you tell them?
Well, first off possibly the pool boy. I would probably talk about his abs or his glowing skin. Maybe Brad Pitt and I would talk about his role in Snatch and I would probably try to recite lines using his Piker accent. He wouldn't be amused but I would go on forever.
That is easy. Because it's not practical all of the time. For instance, from November to March its damn cold outside and I wear a winter hat because my ears are sensitive. So that is not good for spikes. I don't wear spikes during my work week because I have to wear a hard hat while I'm climbing poles (no laughing) and it would be a hot mess. Plus I sweat a lot and it wouldn't go well. So I ask again (totally ignoring that long ass answer), why don't you spike your hair all the time?
What do you think about my BR80/Bert infatuations?
I think they are great except for the dream I had about you and Bert on a tour bus. That was freaky. But it's cool with me because I like them too. Plus they've replaced that geriatric Steven Tyler. Hey. It was getting to a gray area bordering on gross. BR80 and Bert rule! <3
Speaking of, are you Team Candyland or Team BR80?
I'm pretty sure I don't have a choice, do I? I kid, I kid...Candyland all the way. My babes is the best.
If we were in a band together again, what song would I sing that reminds you of me?
If we still played it, Only One from Yellowcard. I loved that jam and it was beautiful when we played it together.
Do you miss THIS cup?
Every moment of every day. I'm not sure if everyone here knows that that was your cup first and I inherited from you. I feel like that whole story is misreported and I got a bad rap from that cup. When I had it, it wasn't disease ridden and left to rot for days at a time on the TV, near the trash, on the counter etc. Plus it reminds me of Cocoa Beach and how we should move there. I wouldn't move there if Br80 himself asked us to. Well....then again...
How often do you read this blog (honestly)?
At least 2-3 times a week. But when I'm here I read everything else that I missed. I like the comments section to see what everyone else has to say, especially when it involves me because I'm narcissistic. I like to google myself. I'm that d'bag. So am I.
How much do you *heart* me?
More than my lousy words can say. You put up with my crap all day every day and for that I am eternally grateful. I love you baby. I love you, you crazy beast.
Well that settles it. Sort of but not really. My boo could go on all day about himself (literally), but I'm afraid he'll inevitably stick his foot in his mouth again so I'll just end it now. Until tomorrow friends, if WE were in a band together, what song would I sing that reminds you of me?
Candyland + Hubs. OUT.