Thursday, September 2, 2010

Feel me up Friday Awards: I know, it's NOT Friday but the hubs is STILL at it

Um, remember Tuesday's post about the hubs's verbal diarrhea? Just now, as I type this, I announced the fact that a pint of his favorite ice cream was waiting in the freezer. With joy on his face, he ran to open the freezer door and without letting his brain catch up to his excitement, he said this: "Thanks, F@$k!"

A moment of silence ensued before I spit out my water all over the computer and watched the screws in his brain work overtime to correct such a random form of gratitude. I laughed for a good twenty minutes. It's times like these I *know* I married the right dude. Now on to biznaass.

Candyland's web time will be limited over the next few days due to a change in location (aka were moving). So let's pretend today is Friday. We'll even keep it short and sweet. Go wash your hands. While you do that, I'll announce the winners of some books I needeth to unloadeth.
Winner of Linger: Matthew Rush
Winner of Picture the Dead: Izzy
Winner of Liar: Sharon Mayhew
Winner of Dreaming Anastasia: aspiring_x

Congrats amigos. Email your mailing address and as soon as I'm able to hop online, write those suckers down and get to the post office, I'll get them to you (assuming you want your book). Are your hands clean and sparkly yet? Do they smell like apples? I like apples.

Random Fact: I refreshed my inbox a thousand times yesterday, but it remained consistently empty. #sad #pathetic #addictedtoyou
Random Fact: I don't drink milk. In fact, I'm watching the hubs guzzle a glass of the tainted bev and I feel the gag reflex acting a fool. I was vegetarian for many years until I got pregnant. Then, I ravaged meat like we were running out. Now that the offspring is nearing four, I've been trying to get back to my veg roots. But milk is still too milky for my taste. Bleh on you, milk. Bleh.

OOOHHHH Thank you for that! With the move and the offspring starting school, I needed that. And a big thank you to the hubs for yesterday's explanation interview. Until next time, what food/bev do you LOATHE? And more importantly, have you ever thanked someone by calling them "F@$k?"
Candyland F@$k. Out.

51 comments:

~Nicole Ducleroir~ said...

Congrats, winners!! Good luck with the move. I know the chaos you must be swirling in -- I just moved a couple years ago but it's fresh in my mind. Enjoy the decluttering process, though!

I love to drink milk, but it has to have ice cubes in it. Yeah, weird. But if it isn't ice cold milk, my gag reflex kicks in. I hate raw oysters. Eck, my throat constricted just thinking about them. Gross.

Best of luck the next couple of days!

Jen said...

I'm glad to hear you know you married the right man. Only certain people can call you certain names and get away with it. I know I married the right person when he can call me things that no one else can, aka 'chubby princess'.

Yay to the winners!! Woohoo!!

Why weren't we emailing one another?? I checked my emails a GAZILLION times and was sad to see it remained empty #disappointed

Matthew Rush said...

YES! That's just what I wanted! Thanks F@$k.

See? I just did.

Summer Ross said...

I've never thanked anyone that way...lol and honestly milk and water I have a hard time downing

Lenny said...

hi miss candace! you got me learning a lot of ways to say stuff that sounds bad buts good. ha ha. im gonna try it with my brothers and sister. i dont drink milk cause it makes me sick. ack! i drink rice milk and tastes ok mostly for on my cereal or with some cookies. shhh dont tell on me but i like beer! but not on my cereal or with cookies. ick! im gonna miss you while your moving. i hope it goes real easy.
...hugs from lenny

LTM said...

OMG! Nobody emailed me yesterday either...! Maybe the entire system was down... (OK, except that one in the v. early a.m. Did you get my reply? Thunder thighs?)

I CAN'T drink milk anymore. Gives me the squirts. So I give milk the evil eye. EVIL milk. EVIL! And I have never thanked anyone w/f#*k.

wait...

Good luck w/your move. Great work picking the right fella. Mine, well, yep. There's just those people in the world~ ;p

Carolyn V. said...

Nuts. I'm allergic, but even the thought of them makes me want to barf. Ew.
I hope the move is quick and smooth. <3

Summer said...

Ugh, milk. I can only drink milk if it's right after peanut butter. I have to drink it then. And only a small glass. For all my milk needs, I either use rice or almond--both taste way better than the cow stuffs.

I hate green bell peppers. You can wave one over a dish, and I swear I'll be able to detect its presence later.

I've not thanked anyone like that...yet! Maybe when I get into nursing school...

Falen (Sarah) said...

LMAO! I'm going to start calling all my loved ones random swears.

Me, i love milk. I don't know if i can think of a beverage i don't like, but my sister made mint pea puree the other day, and though in theory it seemed awesome, i actually gagged a little when it was in my mouth.

Mary McDonald said...

I can say with absolute certainty that I have never called anyone F#@k. lol.

Slamdunk said...

Best wishes with the move.

Personally, I avoid cole slaw.

Renae said...

Congrats to the winners! I swear husbands and thier verbal diarrhea...I have never heard that one before!

Good luck with your move!

aspiring_x said...

WOW! that's got to be the most random verbal diarrhea ever!- at least he's unique! :)

yay! i won a book!!! :) :) i love books way too much!!! (seriously, i wonder if there's something wrong with me!)

mayo- i CANNOT stand mayo, and a lot of the stuff i have to make at work has it, and i have to taste what i prepare to make sure i did it right, and all i can think of is how it just LOOKS like a mass of globdular fat! blech!

Anne said...

I think everyone was sitting watching their inbox yesterday yet no one was mailing.... hmmmm

Shannon O'Donnell said...

Ha ha ha! These little hubs tidbits of yours are too fun - and no, I don't believe I've ever said 'thank you' that way!

I hate, loathe, and despise ONIONS! Yes, I know that's not going to be a very popular answer. But I'm sticking with it. :-)

Nicole Zoltack said...

Congrats, winners! And good luck moving. That's never fun.

Kierah Jane Reilly said...

I hate moving. I hate bleu cheese. And red wine (only because I'm allergic to it). I also tend to call the hubs four-letter words only when he messes up. But now you've given me an idea! Next time he does something nice for me, I'll say "thanks &#^$&#*!!!" and see if I can condition him out of the passive-aggressiveness that usually follows. Think it'll work? Oh, and I get depressed when there's nothing in my inbox. That's why I still subscribe to the Pottery Barn newsletters because that cheery "ding!" makes me so happy.

Sharon K. Mayhew said...

Candace--OMGoodness! I can't believe I won LIAR! (I'd do the viictory dance, but I took two benadryl for allergies and I might end up with a broken leg or worse!) I'll e- you. :)

I really don't like cuccumber water. My hair salon thinks it's very posh to serve. I think it's icky... I also don't like mushy peas. They are served in the north of England with fish and chips.

Have a wonderful move! Enjoy your new home!!!!

Kelly said...

Congrats to the winners! I am wondering if any of them will thank you in the same way as your hubby...
I can't stand the smell, sight nor taste of saurkraut.
Good luck with your move! Are you moving far?

Talli Roland said...

Haha! Um, no I can't say I've even been called that in gratitude!

I'm with you on the milk thang. I also detest marmite, beer (yes, I know), honey, and all vegetables. I am a meatatarian (aka carnivore).

Elana Johnson said...

How can you not drink milk?? I love the stuff. Oh, well, I still love you to pieces. Sorry for the empty inbox. I know just how you feel.

Stephanie said...

I'm with ya on the milk...ewwww gross. Add to the list packaged white bread and mushrooms. And seafood....I have texture issues for sure.

Creepy Query Girl said...

Yes. My husband has called me that at random, believe it or not. He also will look at me and say things like 'I just want to jee-fil you.' (in french 'gifflé' is when you slap someone across the face. Nice huh?) I don't know where he gets it. It's like his brain is off so his mouth tries to make up for lack of entertainment all by itself.

Bekah said...

Oh hubby's!!! IF mine said that, he'd get the WTF? did you call me that for? Most pregnant women crave red meat for the iron- pretty common. I couldn't be vegetarian because I LOVE and I mean LOVE filet mignon, really, THE only steak there is. Hotdogs and hamburgers, now that's a bleh. AND moving? Yuck! Good luck with it : )

Robyn Campbell said...

You are too funny. I needed to laugh. Where do I'Z go to laugh? Your place, of course. Thanks. :)

I'm right with you on the milk. DOUBLE BLEH!

Oh, and check me blog in the early A.M. K? I'll be at home-school co-op. I'm teaching high school Journalism. JOY! But I will return in the afternoon.

Oh, and your hubs sounds pretty cool. Keep him. :)

Katherine C said...

That is hilarious what your husband said ...

And milk is delicious!!

I can't stand olives, personally. They feel like eyeballs to me.

Have fun moving!

Riv Re said...

Congrats, winners!
No milk? What about cheese, or ice cream?

Kelly Dexter said...

Your house sounds like a hilarious place to be :-)

I've been a vegetarian for a few years and absolutely love it. I've been thinking about going vegan -dabbled a bit, picked up Alicia Silverstone's awesome book The Kind Diet- but it's not something I'm ready to fully commit to. Maybe one day.

As for foods I despise, I can in no way whatsoever deal with anything coconut. Regardless of what it's in or on, my brain becomes convinced I'm eating sunscreen.

Angie Ledbetter said...

Great blawg! Glad I came by from KarenG's bbq post.

Matthew Rush said...

Just coming back because Tim miss Beth. Have a good move.

Stina Lindenblatt said...

I love milk, but it HAS to be skim. I can't drink anything else.

And I hate coffee. Love the smell of it though. ;)

Dianne K. Salerni said...

I hope your moving day is going smoothly!

My kids tell me I say some strange things when I'm distracted on the computer and they ask me a question. But I'm pretty sure I never said THAT.

Kaitlyn said...

Hi! Stopping by from the blog BBQ to say hello. I'm your newest follower =D

-Kaitlyn
http://nocturnalreadings.blogspot.com

Erin Kane Spock said...

I am not a milk fan, but it doesn't make me gag.
Raw Oysters do make me gag. My husband loves them. Feeling them on my tongue, even shooting them, gag gag gag. Seriously.
And they're supposed to be an aphrodisiac?
I can eat cooked oysters. The slime aspect is no longer there.
I also cannot drink/eat boba teas. Same reasons.

Good luck in the move!

Lisa Potts said...

Moving sucks! And I think cottage cheese is vile. There, I said it. I feel much better now.

Thanks for dropping by my blog from the BBQ. I'll definitely be following yours.

Liz Fichera said...

And I used to think I was the only one who didn't like milk! ;-) Nice to meet you, Candy!

Joanna St. James said...

I love milk and am lactose intolerant i'd rather be in pain than not have milk
Shrimps on the other hand just get me why can't they all be small like prawns? shudders

Julie Musil said...

Oh my gosh, your husband cracks me up. And I only like milk on my cereal!

Hey, good luck with your move. I know that can get a little crazy and you just want to be settled.

Deborah said...

Hi there! Thanks for joining my blog! Your blog is AWESOME! I don't drink milk, eggs or banana's .. All three, to me are disgusting!
Have a great weekend!

Donna Hosie said...

Hi Candace, thanks for stopping by at my party. I'm very happy to visit Candyland!

Talei said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Talei said...

Hi!

I'm over from Karens BBQ, lovely to meet you and am glad I found your blog!

Great awards title! Congrats to all winners too! ;)

Talei said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Talei said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kaitlyn said...

I brought baked beans =D Yummm

mytressa said...

Hi, thanks for stopping by! And thank you for the advice. I just started blogging so it's much appreciated.

Love your blog! Well, my husband's never called me a name of that sort, but he's called me bro, dude, and man after talking to his friends. Lol!

Jennifer Lane said...

Hey Candace, I'm here for the blog barbecue. And I seem to be your neighbor--I'm in Ohio too (Columbus). Great blog! Good luck with the pottytraining of your kids and the pottymouth of your husband. ;)

Shelley Sly said...

I love the word vomit stories you've been describing. Sounds like I would be cracking up if I was in your shoes. :)

Also, I don't drink milk either.

Thanks for stopping by my blog!

WizzyTheStick said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog. I've 'followed' you. You are a riot. I am enjoying your sense of humour

Carol Kilgore said...

I'm so laughing. Can't wait to hear about your move. Thanks for stopping by the Tiki Hut.

arlee bird said...

How did I get here? Was it a BBQ or a Trifecta fest? Well, I'm here, so I followed, and I love milk but milk don't love me so much anymore, although I'll still risk feeling bad in order to enjoy a good chocolate milkshake now and then. So when you're done moving or whatever you're doing you can stop by and visit my blog and leave some kind of comment if you feel like it. I'm always open to smart ass witticisms as well as deep, dark, mind-sinking ponderings or anything else you want to say.

Lee
Tossing It Out